One of my favorite talks given by church leaders is called "The Tender Mercies of the Lord," by Elder David A. Bednar. You can read it here. In this talk we're taught that there are no coincidences - everything comes from God. Everything. Elder Bednar teaches that "the Lord’s tender mercies are the very personal and individualized blessings, strength, protection, assurances, guidance, loving-kindnesses, consolation, support, and spiritual gifts which we receive from and because of and through the Lord Jesus Christ." And when we look for these tender mercies, we'll discover that we're given them every day in small ways and in larger ways. This talk has truly changed my life.
Two years ago I had an experience that reinforced this principle of tender mercies from God. In January I went in to visit my doctor, who is a friend of ours, for my usual annual physical. At this time I was teaching early morning seminary and was really, really busy. I almost cancelled this appointment several times, thinking I was just too busy and felt like I was totally fine. But I went anyway (Tender Mercy #1).
We repeated the ultrasound four months later and the nodule had grown so my doctor referred me to an endocrinologist and also for a biopsy. Unfortunately, the endocrinologist couldn't even see me for 2 months, which just wouldn't work for me. It was already early June and I wanted to get things taken care of before school and seminary started in August and before taking Kam to college the beginning of September. So I talked to our doctor's referral coordinator, who is also a friend, and she gave me some other names. I found an endocrinologist who could see me in a few weeks (Tender Mercy #2). My doctor knew what was going on with my timeline and bypassed the endocrinologist and got me an appointment for the biopsy that was also only a couple of weeks away (Tender Mercy #3).
Rewind: Back in April while cleaning one day I got the feeling that I should schedule Parker's annual Scout/Sports physical. Right. Now. I usually don't schedule these until summer rolls around, but I kept having this feeling. So I stopped cleaning and scheduled it for the last Monday in June (Tender Mercy #4).
Fast forward: I went to my biopsy on the last Thursday in June, and as I was leaving, the technician said, "I usually don't do this, but if you'll give me your phone number, I'll call you with the results tomorrow so you don't have to wait until next week to know what's going on. But I'm sure everything is fine. And if you have to pick a cancer, this is the one to pick." Great. Still not making me feel much better, but I was so thankful she was willing to throw away the usual protocol and let me know what was going on (Tender Mercy #5). I think she could tell I was pretty nervous about the whole thing.
That next afternoon she called. She said, "You might want to get a paper and pencil and sit down." Not exactly what you want to hear when you're waiting for test results.She told me that the results showed the possibility of cancer and that I'd have to have the nodule removed. Fabulous. John and I started googling what she said the medical terms were, which I can't remember, so we could know what we were facing and where we stood. Just having some knowledge helped us feel a little better about things.
Sunday night we had a youth fireside(meeting) at church and John talked to our doctor and told him what was going on. He said he needed to see me ASAP and when John told him I had a physical scheduled for Parker that next morning (remember Tender Mercy #4?), he said he'd talk to me then.
I went with Parker to his appointment but my doctor hadn't received the test results yet. Thankfully, since the technician had called me with the results, I could tell him what they were and he said we needed to find a surgeon. His referral lady gave me some names and I called them, hoping to get it taken care of ASAP. I made an appointment with one surgeon, but just didn't feel right about him. I told John about this and he just happened to be visiting with some friends of ours that night, one of which is a nurse and had just had neck surgery, so she gave him the name of her surgeon, who she totally loved (Tender Mercy #6). I called them and was able to schedule an appointment 1 1/2 weeks later. Getting this appointment alone usually takes a couple of months (Tender Mercy #7).
I loved the surgeon! I felt totally at peace with him and we scheduled the surgery for 1 1/2 weeks later, which was really fast (Tender Mercy #8). I met with the endocrinologist during that time and she agreed with what was going on.
The day before my surgery Zach got permission from his mission president to call us - missionaries usually only call on Christmas and Mother's Day (Tender Mercy #9). It was so good to talk to him!
On July 21, 2009, I had the nodule and my left thyroid removed. I was so nervous because I'd never been "put under" before. But as we were talking to the anesthesiologist, he totally put me at ease (John found out while talking to him after the surgery that he's a member of our church. We had kind of thought that)(Tender Mercy #10).
The surgery went well. No cancer!!!! Woohoo!!!! Kam brought Parker and Kailen to visit me that afternoon and they thought my drain line was totally gross (I'd have to agree with them on that). Our awesome home teacher took them out for dinner that night (Tender Mercy #11). It's such a blessing to have "family" to help you out during trying times. Zach also called later that day to see how things went and it was so good to talk to him again.
I went home the next morning and John and the kids gave me the royal treatment. Kam did the laundry and they all waited on me hand and foot. Because my neck was really achy I couldn't drink out of a cup or even any of the water bottles we had, so Kam went to Walmart and came back with several so we could find just the right one. And since I'd had to remove the nail polish off of my toes prior to surgery, Kam repainted them for me (she knows I don't like my toes to be naked). Awesome family = Tender Mercy #12!
Seminary started 2 1/2 weeks later and even though the first couple of weeks were a little rough because I wasn't totally feeling like "me" yet, it went fine. And I was healed and ready to take Kam to college the beginning of September (Tender Mercy #13).
During the surgery they did notice four other much smaller nodules on my right thyroid, but in two years they haven't grown even a millimeter so hopefully they'll behave and stay that way (Tender Mercy #14). All my bloodwork has come back normal so I don't even have to take any medications (Tender Mercy #15).
Even though this was a really trying time in my life, I could see all along the way the tender mercies the Lord was sending me. Every step of the way. From small things to larger things. And it reminded me, daily, of how much He is aware of what we're going through and of how much He loves us and blesses us. Every single day. Especially during trying times.
And I'm so very thankful for that.
*Image courtesy ofhttp://publicphoto.org/objects/bouncy-balls/attachment/bouncy-balls_63019/
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